The Scariest of Storms

It was the middle of September, 2004.  We were just a few weeks into the school year at college.  There was a bit of an excited buzz all about campus.  A hurricane was headed our way and preparations were well underway.  Because the college I went to was on the Gulf of Mexico, hurricanes were not an uncommon thing.  The campus buildings were build with this in mind.  But this was the first time in my several years attending there that experiencing a hurricane actually seemed like it was going to happen.

I was a student leader on campus - an assistant to the dorm manager.  So I was busy helping her do what needed to be done as we all prepared to enter the shelters.  We met as a student body, were given instructions, then everyone headed off to their assigned shelters.  Besides myself being at this college, I also had my younger sister as a student, my brother and sister-in-law were on staff, and Matt, who was "just" my boyfriend at the time.  We were all assigned to separate shelters.  I was to stay with my resident manager to help her oversee the couple hundred students that were to stay in the halls of the first two floors of our building.

The storm started with rain - lots of it.  Then the winds picked up.  All the students assigned to our building were crammed in the hallways, finding ways to entertain themselves.  I was out in the lobby with the resident manager, two security guards, and a maintenance staff member.  We were laughing, snacking, playing UNO, and all around having a good time.  We weren't worried about the storm - the weather people were calling for the worst of the storm to hit landfall quite far from us (and we all know weather people are never wrong...😝). We were going to be fine.  It was going to be an adventure.

The lobby for our building was open up to the second storey.  The "walls" we're actually floor to ceiling windows which gave a direct view to a large part of the campus.  There were stairs leading to a balcony where you could look out the windows at the scenery.  While we were playing our games, we sat looking out at the storm.  The wind started causing the trees to bend more and more and the noise got louder and a little more eerie.  At one point, after playing my card in our game of UNO, I looked up just in time to see a tree in front of the building fall over - roots and all!

I think it was at this point we started to think this might be a little more intense than we initially expected.  The sky was very very dark.  The doors, although locked, were rattling.  We walked up the stairs to the balcony to get a better view of what was going on.  I remember standing there, looking not out the windows but at them.  They were shaking and literally bowing - much more than I thought was safe or possible.  I asked the maintenance guy, "is that supposed to be happening?  Are they going to break?"  He, very calmly, replied, "Yes, probably at some point tonight, they will break."

We then decided it was best if we, too, got to the hallways where we would be safe and not exposed like we were in the lobby.  We were standing in the balcony/second floor level area making a plan with the security guys and maintenance man where everyone was going to go (we had several hallways filled with students and wanted to divide up).  And then  it happened.

The windows broke.  They didn't shatter until they hit the floor. Rather, the whole frame, glass and all, fell out - which was exactly what they were built to do.  As soon as they fell, chaos ensued.  I remember how the air pressure immediately changed and my ear drums felt like they were going to burst.  My hair was swirling all around my face and I could barely hear what everyone else was saying.  The wind was SO strong and SO loud!  The two security guys ran to one hallway, the maintenance guy to another, and the residence manager and myself ran to the other one.  The pressure was so strong that it made it difficult to open the doors as we had to pull them out against the wind.  But, we got them opened and ran into the hallway, the door slamming behind us.  The 50 or so girls in the dark hallway all looked at us and we assured them everything was fine, just that the windows blew out (not like they didn't already know this - they heard the huge crash).

We sat down by the door and caught our breaths.  It was only then that I realized how hard my heart was pounding.  And that's when the fear set in.  We were right by the door since there was no other place to sit.  The hallway was crammed full of people.  We had to leave in such a hurry that the RM and I didn't have anything with us - no food, water, pillows - nothing.  So we just sat there for the rest of the night.

The wind was still very loud.  The door was rattling so much we were afraid it would be pulled open at some point.  All throughout the night we heard the crashing of windows breaking, of more glass shattering.

When morning finally came and the storm had passed, everyone poured out of their shelters and assessed the damage.  Trees down everywhere.  Glass everywhere.  No running water. No electricity.  No air conditioning (remember, we were in Florida - after a storm - it was hot and very very humid!).

The excitement that was in the air before the storm had now turned to other things.  Everyone was hot.  We were hungry (the school always prepared food for hurricanes, but it's not the same as a solid meal).  We were exhausted.  Then the complaining started.  Parents started calling demanding their children be sent home.  It pretty much turned to chaos.  I was busy helping the RM keep track of which students were going home and dealing with the complaining students.  I remember one girl being completely hysterical with me because she couldn't flush her toilet.  I looked her in the eye, and said to her (not in my most polite tone) to keep quiet because she had it much better than many people in our city and she needed to be thankful for what she had.

And it was true.  Our campus had damage.  But it was nothing compared to the damage in the city around us.  Whole houses were gone.  I don't know how many thousands of roofs were blown off. And many of those whose roof didn't blow off still had to cover huge gaping holes they did get in it with blue tarps.  Cars were smashed under trees.  Thousands and thousands of people had no running water or electricity.  Some people lost everything they had.  And not everyone had bottles of fresh water or boxes of food like we had.

Many students left to go home to their families or relatives that lived within driving distance.  My family lived too far away, but it just so happened that my parents were in North Carolina that week at a conference at a Christian camp.  My oldest brother and his wife worked at this camp so they were there too.  After a lot of discussion and assurance from my residence manager that she would be fine and that I should go up to see my parents, I got in a car with my sister, brother, sis-in-law, and Matt.  We headed up to NC.  After a few hours, we realized just how hungry we were so we pulled over at the first place we saw to get something to eat - a McDonalds.  Now, say what you want about McD's, but I tell you, those cheeseburgers were so tasty at that time.  It still makes me laugh to think back on all five of us, crammed in a little car late at night, chowing down on cheeseburgers and french fries like we hadn't eaten in a week.

We arrived in North Carolina and the camp was gracious enough to give us a free place to stay.  We were able to get warm showers and comfortable beds.  They fed us all our meals for the few days while we were there.  They called us the "refugees from Florida."  After just a couple days, the water was on again, the electricity was back (which meant the AC was working!) and we headed back to campus to resume classes.

I think it was on the way back that it hit me just how scary that night during the storm was.  I thought back to how, literally just minutes before the windows fell in, I had been standing in that lobby where they fell.  If we hadn't moved, we would have been hurt very badly - or worse.  I remembered how strong the wind was once the windows broke.  I've never felt that strong of a force.  I remembered many things that I thought and felt that night.  But the worst feeling of all of them was how completely and utterly helpless I was to change anything that was happening.

I had no control over anything.  And it was terrifying.

I couldn't keep the door from rattling (and I mean shake like you've never seen!) or stop the wind from howling or the glass from breaking.  I couldn't even check to see that my family or Matt was safe.  I could do nothing to change these things.  All I could do was pray and trust God to keep everyone safe.

Going through Hurricane Ivan is something that I will always remember (we also went through Hurricane Katrina the next year, but the worst part didn't hit where we were).  Ivan wasn't "supposed" to hit where we were.  We were just supposed to get the outskirts of it, which is why we really weren't worried.  But last minute the storm "jumped" and we got some of the worst of the storm.

I think back and remember all the feelings I had.  But I also think back on it and see some life lessons I can take from my experience.

While this was an actual physical storm, we often go through different types of "storms" in our lives - mental, physical, spiritual, and even emotional.  These storms can be just as scary and we can feel just as helpless.  But it is through these storms that we should come to the same conclusion - there is only ever one Person in charge of things.  Only one Person able to handle these things.  Only one Person in control.

Sitting there that night, unable to protect anyone or anything, I was confronted with my own inability to control the storm.   It would be completely naive of me to think I could do anything to change the storm.  As for that physical storm, all I could do was be smart and stay in my shelter.  And pray for God's protection.  And trust God.  After all, He is the one who created the hurricane.  He's the One who decided to have it change course.  He was the one who was in control of that storm.

And He is the one who is in control of all the other storms in our lives. We are mortal, finite beings.  We have a beginning and an end.  We do not know all things.  We cannot be everywhere at once. But God - He has always been and always will be.  He knows everything.  He is everywhere at all times.  What comfort we can take in knowing that!

I don't know why God allowed that storm to destroy so much that night.  But I do know that God protected me and my family.  It was terrifying, but we survived it.  He provided for us.  God was in control.  He reminded me of my need to be totally dependent on Him.  The same goes for the other storms in my life.  I don't know why God asks me to go through storms or "trials" in life.  But I do know this.  Even in the storm, He is in control.  He is protecting me - sometimes from things I don't even know about.  He is always providing for me.  And because of that, I can take comfort.  I can trust.  I can be totally dependent on Him.  Even in the scariest of storms.